Life is a beautiful thing. And precious, and oh so fragile! My heart is sad right now.
Yesterday, I took my kids to Cowen’s Gap again. What else are we going to do when it’s 103.3 degrees outside? My friend Heather, and her 16 month old son came too. (Bryce Eric is two weeks older than Megan, and it’s so not fair, because I was due first!) Another friend, Angie, and her 14 month old daughter Sophie followed us up to the Gap. I tell you, it was just a swimming kind of day!
Angie lost a baby recently due to an ectopic pregnancy. While we were at the beach, another friend from church was giving birth to a dead baby girl. She’d been carrying her baby for seven and a half months, so the death was unexpected. Aren’t most deaths? I cried, because I know how special children are. I know how much a mom bonds with her unborn child, even from the moment those pink lines show up on a pee strip!
This morning, I was grumpy because I didn’t get to drink my coffee before it turned warm. (Not even cold, just warm!) Then I remembered the Kipe family, and how the death of their baby girl is just consuming their life right now. I thought, “How foolish and petty I am!” So many times, not just today. I get frustrated when Megan crawls after me and cries. And since I have to hold her, I can’t wash my dishes and then my kitchen is filthy. Toys and dirt on the floor get on my nerves, and many times I wish Cameron would stop saying, “Push me on the swing?” All day long! Yesterday, first thing in the morning, when my eyes were still half shut, I tried, “Just wait until Mommy’s eyes are open.” Cameron pointed out, “Your eyes are open.” Yes, well, that’s just a technicality.
Cory used to beg me all day long to push him on the swing. He doesn’t anymore. I wish I’d pushed him more. I wish I would learn one of these days that dirt and dishes and toys don’t matter in eternity. Children do! I have them with me for just a short time. It could be even shorter than I think. Lord, teach me to treasure every moment!