I have been drop-dead exhausted recently. I know, I know — how entertaining is that?! But this is my Motherhood Chronicles. And right now, on the time-line, I’m TIRED! Dee and I sit down to watch a movie, and yep, you guessed it — I fall asleep! Without fail. Even if it’s a movie I asked him to pick up at Redbox!
The thought, “You could be pregnant…” crosses my mind, but then I laugh hysterically. (Also in my head, yes. I try very hard not to look like a dork!) I laughed the other week when Babycenter.com sent me an e-mail titled, “10 Reasons You’re Not Getting Pregnant.” What? You guys think I’m TRYING?
I DO love my kids to death, and I DO want more kids. But maybe not quite yet?
You can ask Dee though, I’m already catching baby fever here and there! I say stuff like, “Babe, if we just have 6 kids, how close do we want the next baby to be to Zach? Not too far apart in age, right? I mean, they need to be pretty close to be playmates.” Yeah, when I say stuff like that, Dee reminds me that Zach isn’t even a year old yet. So we have time…
He’s good for me, that man.
He sets boundaries. He knows I’m my own worst enemy when it comes to kids! I’d have a million of them, but then get stressed out and be “Yelly Mom.”
True story: The other day we were watching a WWII movie, set in Denmark, about the people hiding their Jewish neighbors and helping them escape to Sweden. So, the main mom, right? She’s upset at one point. My Cameron, he says, “Hey mom! That girl, the one with the big head, the yelly one — she looks like you!” Thanks, son. I’m not afraid to fish for compliments, so I asked, “Does that mean you think I’m pretty?” (Movie-mom had blond hair.) He half-snorted. “NO!” My other kids were all quick to chime in unison, “We think you’re pretty, Mommy!”
Sometimes their honesty melts your heart, and sometimes it hits you like a ton of bricks.
I’m almost positive Cameron was comparing me to movie-mom because of the blond hair and european cheekbones, not because of the yelling. But it still pricked my heart!
A mom at church said something that keeps reminding me of the right heart-tone towards children. We were in the nursing-moms room, talking about large families, and I mentioned how I easily get impatient. She said, she too, gets frazzled in a crowd (8 kids). She told me about the other day, when her kids went upstairs to watch a movie. One little guy wandered back downstairs to spend time with Mommy. She told me, with her hand over her heart and a happy sigh, “I just love that!”
She treasures those one-on-one moments.
If I’m gonna be honest here, I have to say that I sometimes grump about kids constantly trailing me, begging for Mommy time.
So I’m working on that! “Me-time” is hugely over-rated. I’m pretty sure that even though Jesus withdrew to be alone at times, He would never have scowled at a child that found His resting place. He would have delighted in that child.
Tomorrow is Mother’s Day, and my goal is to treat my 5 beautiful children like the precious treasures that they are! I will seek to bless them as they have blessed me. I can’t even imagine not being a mother!